Why “why” is the killer of taking action


As summer began I and a friend put ourselves on a summer challenge to getjustdoit our bodies healthy.

I intentionally chose getting healthy over losing weight (yes, I needed that too) because when I’m eating healthy and doing good things for my body, my weight naturally moves into a healthier zone as well.

As we began the journey, my friend sent me this text: “I just want to UNDERSTAND why I eat the way that I do.” and my coaching brain immediately thought “Uh-oh”.

You see,  the challenge with being a coach is that you have to learn NOT to coach everybody on the planet.  When people ask for coaching or feedback, I happily share.  When they don’t, I have learned to turn my coaching frequency down and filter my language.

This is what I sent back ….

“Understanding always gives me good information too but THIS TIME, I (strong emphasis on I) am going to focus on taking action and appreciate whatever understanding comes along the way.”

Do you get the distinction?

As women, we tend to want to psychoanalyze and UNDERSTAND everything.  Why we do this or that. Why we’re drawn to a certain type of partner that isn’t good for us or why we can’t get to the gym after work…

Not only do we want to understand ourselves but we want to “make-up” why other people behave the way THEY do!! Why does someone else do this or that? And while the psychological reasons and history are valid (especially if there is psychopathology involved), accomplishing goals ultimately involves TAKING ACTION whether we understand what blocks us or not.

Several months later, I am the healthiest I have been in a couple of years and my friend?  Well, she’s still unhealthy, overweight and trying to understand WHY she can’t get it together…

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